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Back Then and Now…a journey to old age

bugs bunnyI had always imagined I would  slide from sexy, young thing (yes, I was that once) into middle-aged maturity, and then coast into becoming an elegant dowager, but as Bugs Bunny often said, “I think I made a wrong turn at Albuquerque.” I just realized I missed elegant dowager and zoomed right into crabby old lady. Currently, almost everyone under the age of 70 drives me nuts.

I can handle the rapping, thumping, tuneless music of the younger generation easily, rapperbecause I don’t listen to it.  And as for the abundance of pointless, vulgar movies, I don’t go to them.
But, I suggest the entertainment industry should wise up. Baby Boomers, all of whom have passed 65, make up the largest group in our population and we were savers. Have plenty of money to spend.. If you want to make money, you better start catering to us old geezers. And I don’t mean more early bird specials. Some of us prefer to eat after 4:30 in the afternoon.

Here is a list of recent things that make me question the intelligence of younger people:

gluten free1. A label on powdered sugar that stated “Gluten Free.” Only wheat and a couple of other grains have gluten, so this is like putting on a label on bananas that says “meat free.”

The world has gone gluten free nuts….gluten is not the devil…it is pain and sickness to those with Celiac disease, but that is a small percentage of the population and most people with Celiac disease know what to avoid.

2. Chips and crackers that have labels saying “Cholesterol free.” Again any person with ano cholesterol half of brain know cholesterol is found in animal fats, so the chance of hamburger being shoved inside Cheetos is slim.

flourToday I bought a12-pound bag of flour…the printing at the top of the bag said. “Flour is raw. Cook before enjoying.” I wonder, how many people eat sacks of raw flour?

“Don’t eat raw cookies dough!” I’ve been doing this for years and look, I am still alive. I let my granddaughter eat raw dough too, and yes I know the dough includes raw eggs, and now god-forbid raw flour. I told her, “When I read in the paper that people are dropping dead daily from eating raw cookie dough, I’ll stop. Until then, no way.”

If you lived through road trips with no seat belts, bike riding and sidewalk roller skating with no helmet or knee pads, mecurochromehaving Mercurochrome and Merthiolate (both of which are laced with mercury) slathered on your scratches, then like me, you are a fossil, a living dinosaur and you have earned the right to be a crabby old man or lady.

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